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I`m all over that like a fat kid on a Smarty
It`s so cold Miley Cyrus got her toungue stuck on her wrecking ball
You had me at, "we`ll make it look like an accident."
to do list: buy a parrot. teach the parrot to say, "Help!! I`ve been turned into a parrot!"
I chose the wrong fork in the road, took the road less travelled and got off the beaten path and now I don`t know where the hell I am.
I`m pretty sure by now “lazy” is just part of my personality description.
One day on Mercury lasts about 1,400 hours. Roughly the same as one Monday on earth feels.
How did people crash their vehicles before cellphones?
Debate?.....isn`t that what you use to catch "The Fish" ?
When you drink alcohol you are just borrowing happiness from tomorrow.
The skinny girl inside me once tried to come out. I shut that b*tch up with a cupcake
I wish I could afford to have a drinking problem.
After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me " maybe life isn`t for everyone"
I may look calm, but in my head I´ve punched you in the face 3 times already!
Some of you are like family to me. I don’t want you calling me either.