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Vodka and denial are cheaper than therapy.
Yes I`m still bitter about my name not being mentioned in "Mambo No. 5"
i just accidentally used AOL online, im betting the workers there are celebrating and think they have a chance in the future. lol
I love to start my day by getting on Facebook to see who is a whiny little bi!ch today.
The only thing I hate about beer is that there`s absolutely nothing I hate about beer... :)
Dear person reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.
Damn…I’m having an out of money experience.
Keychains were invented so that you can lose all of your keys at once.
Are you one of those people that get hurt from things posted on Facebook? You can easily avoid that by keeping your a$$ off of Facebook.
1: Say "Unh! 2: Mumble three spanish words. 3: list four cities. You just made a Pitbull song.
When I`m not sleepy, I listen to some Chris Brown. That knocks me out right away.
Your so lazy you should have a Life Alert bracelet that says I`m Just Napping.
Men ask us if we`re naked when we tell them we`re taking a bath. THAT`S why they pay more for their car insurance.
It’s not the holiday season unless you push your body to the brink of alcoholism and diabetes.
Next on SportsCenter: Where is Tim Tebow watching the Super Bowl and how will that impact the game?