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The larger the implants, the more likely she’ll be confused by a push/pull door.
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I was so disturbed by hearing about all the people using marijuana today that I almost dropped my deep-fried Snickers bar into my 48oz Coke.
Apparently when a trainer asks you why you want to get in shape and you answer "revenge" it will raise a couple eyebrows.
Why does toilet paper need a commercial? Who is not buying this?
Do whatever you want. And if it’s something you’re going to regret in the morning…sleep late.
I saw a woman crying as she was buying tampons earlier.....must be going through a tough period in her life....
It has been scientifically proven that any woman can be satisfied with only 3 1/2 inches — and it doesn’t matter if it is Visa or MasterCard
I go to a gym called Resolutions. It has exercise equipment for the first 2 weeks of each year, then becomes a bar for the remaining 50.
The best thing about humans is that many of the richest and most prosperous among us collect bottles of rotten grape juice.
"Trust your gut" is terrible advice. How can I put trust in something that tells me to eat an entire pizza when I get drunk?
Turning on your lights and siren after you lose a drag race is just poor sportsmanship.
When a cashier asks if you have a rewards card, look down, sigh, and say, "My wife took everything when she left"
Facebook`s list of "suggested friends" is quite literally a list of people I`ve been avoiding my entire life.
I want to tell my coworker I have strong feelings for her, but I`m afraid things might get weird if she knows I hate her.