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If this world got any smaller I`d probably fall off - George T. Ignace
My teen thought it`d be funny to post as me on Facebook. I laughed and laughed and changed the wi-fi password. Good times!
Have you noticed that tire stores never hang big banners that say "Blowout Sale"?
Maybe Voldemort`s face is flat because he ran into the wrong wall at the train station.
My friends says that I spend too much time talking to random people online. What do you guys think?
It`s so cute how you can throw balls right at kids faces in the Chuck E Cheese ball pit and they think you`re just playing.
If someone tells you `I love you` but you don`t feel the same way and don`t wanna make it awkward just say `I love YouTube` really fast
I hate when its dark and your brain is all "you know what we haven`t thought about in a while ... demons."
Nintendo should handle education, I don’t remember half the crap from high school but I know all of Super Mario World’s secrets.
I was at a nice restaurant tonight and accidentally left out a loud fart. 4 people turned around. For a minute, I thought I was on "The Voice".
I want to sleep tighter
The general rule is that you shouldn`t ride an elevator during a fire, but I mean, talk about a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity
Dear Fox news,I have yet to see any news about foxes. Sincerely, disappointed viewer.
Some people live life in the fast lane. You’re in oncoming traffic.
drinks well with others.