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Halloween Drinking Game: Drink every-time an Elsa (from Frozen) visits your house.
If you don`t know where you are going, any road will get you there.
Every loaf of bread is a tragic story of grains that could`ve become beer, but didn`t
I need to find a way to be asleep but still get all my work done.
Offering someone food and secretly hoping they say no.
If I drunk text you and you`re sleeping, don`t text me in the morning. That ship has sailed.
If you ever feel like a failure, just know that somewhere in the world, someone just lost their straw inside a Capri Sun.
When you are dead, you don’t know you are dead but other people do. The same applies when you are stupid.
Well, all I have to say is TGIF. (Post this on any day but Friday to get comments)
You had me at "do we need to stop at the liquor store on the way to your place"
I always put in a full eight hours at work. Spread out over the course of the week.
Friends are like condoms… they protect you when things get hard.
Only YOU, can prevent bathroom mirror pictures.
dreams of a better world... where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She`s 97 today and we don`t know where the hell she is.