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I once tried sniffing coke, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck up my nose.
My wife and I decided to make our own sex tape. She was pissed off when I started holding auditions for her part.
My father was never proud of me. One day he asked me, "How old are you?" I said, "I`m five." He said, "When I was your age I was six."
Don`t forget, If anyone asks we are a normal family.
A new study suggests that a future study will completely contradict this study.
Apparently typos only become visible to the human eye after you hit send.
Can anyone recommend a few thousand books on hoarding?
eHarmony matched me with a bean bag chair with duct tape on it
Say what you want about the porn industry. But they are hard workers.
I would really like to help you move your furniture tomorrow, but I’m going to be too busy sitting on mine.
Nicknames are way more fun when people don’t know they have them.
"Are you even listening to me?" is a weird way for my girlfriend to start a conversation.
I put on real clothes today. What more do you want from me?
Having kids puts a new perspective on life.
I`ve got worms !!!! ......... worms in me garden