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Sorry that offended you, I really didn’t think you’d get it.
that awkard moment when someone`s laugh is actually funnier than the joke
Doctor: How is your headache? Me: She is fine.
Divorce is expensive because its worth it.
I wish more people would give me the silent treatment.
This morning, I was beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator. I was staring at her boobs when she said, “Would you please press 1?” So I did. I don’t remember much afterwards.
if you were 2 times as smart as you are now ... you would still be stupid
I wonder how many couples would still be together if they traded phones for a weekend
That akward moment you try and deep throat a banana and get caught ... and your a dude.
Dear Vegetarians, Thanks for saving the good food for us.
That awkward moment when you take a bath in the middle of the day and don`t know whether to wear normal clothes or pajamas.
It’s too bad that it’s easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
What are the words I`m looking for? Oh yeah...Eat sh!t and die.
I don`t get women. Also, I don`t understand them.
Once again its friday I know its only been 7 days since the last one but feels like its been a week....