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Apparently you have to go to the gym more than once to get in shape, what the hell.
United should roll out Rodeo Rewards where you get paid based on how long you are able to stay on the plane when you are chosen to volunteer.
I love Halloween because it`s the only night of the year I may end up getting drunk with Batman and going home with a cheerleader.
I bet when Hugh Hefner dies no one will say "He`s in a better place now."
I`m watching a show about surviving in the wild in case I ever decide to log off and go outside.
Pouring a bucket of white marbles into the hippo pen will result in a lifetime ban from the zoo no matter how hungry they looked.
So another day has come and gone and I still haven`t used algebra
ROFL!!….. LOL jk i’m still in my chair.
Redneck Term Of Thee Day-Wisdom: "Mah bruther had him some kidney stones, but he wisdom out!"
There are two reasons I would never drink toilet water. Number 1 and number 2.
Agreeing to disagree is lame. Let’s agree to take turns slapping each other until one of us admits we were wrong.
Scratch and Sniff Here [____] …Smells like glass, doesn’t it
Hi there beautiful, can I drive you to drink?
I try to always be the bigger person by hanging out with a lot of short people.
I`m not interested in anything that requires 5 hours of energy.