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therapy is expensive...vodka is not. need I say more....
Just seen a sign reading "PAY ATTENTION WHILE WALKING your Facebook status update can wait". While on Facebook on my phone. While walking...
One of these days I`m going to get help for my procrastination problem.
Please don`t post pictures of cats on my FB wall. I am allergic.
We`re up to Fast n Furious #6. Shouldn`t they just create a weekly TV series?
Big shout-out to slugs! Those little guys are out there everyday, doing all the same stuff as snails but without helmets.
My apartment is so dirty that I actually lost my last girlfriend to the 5 second rule.
It deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer are in the rghit pcale. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a pobelrm. Tihs is buseace the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Tihs wulod not be psibsole if yuor sutipd. I hpoe for yuor skae you wree albe to raed tihs or taht maens yuor an idoit or barin dmagaed.
The pharmacist asked me my birthday again today. Pretty sure she`s going to get me something.
If goldfish crackers actually tasted like goldfish-- wait, I just realized I`ve never tasted a goldfish. What if the crackers are accurate?
I just want you to be happy. And naked.
If booze isn`t the answer, then your question sucks.
If they gave out awards for laziness, I would have to send somebody to accept it for me.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I hate you bye
How`d this get posted?