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I watched Americas Got Talent for 15 minutes and I beg to differ.
Today would be a great day to leave a note on a random car that says "I know what you did".
"I got this." Translated: I most certainly do not have this, but prepare to be thoroughly entertained.
I’m not shy. I’m just holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.
I was just chatting with my cat about how being lonely can make a person crazy.
These people keep looking at me like I`m the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Let`s be honest. The only reason you listen to your voice-mail messages is to make the stupid icon disappear
Give a man a fish and he`ll go to McDonald`s instead. Teach a man to fish and nope, still McDonald`s
If you keep bending your iPhone 6 you`ll eventually have a sweet flip phone.
"It`s not about who`s right or wrong."~ The person that is wrong
My blood hound was just attacked by a Crip hound.
I`m using voice-to-text to post this status. All I do is talk and it makes a text out of it. It`s really cool... Hey! What are you doing? That`s my phone! Give it back! Come back here, you son of a...
Social Media: Because I like to socialize with cool people without having to speak, wear pants or get off the couch.
She caught my iphone before it hit the ground... She`s definitely my screensaver
Technically, every picture is a before picture.