Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

How the hell do you call Batman during the day?
I know I`m in trouble when the voice in my head starts using my middle name
I`m here to pick you up when you fall. Whether I tripped you is another thing...
I don`t have any "driving the speed limit" music.
How long do I have to wear these skinny jeans before they start working?
It should cost $10 to leave someone a voicemail.
Show me a bunch of people with type A personalities, and I`ll show you a control group.
I`m off to get my beauty sleep. Yeah, I know...I`m already so beautiful you can`t stand it! I promise...a little more isn`t lethal...yet! ;) Goodnight!
What does envelope 1 of 3 on my credit card bill mean?
Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
Famous words from Fergie... "Boom Boom Pow!" Happy 4th of July!!
A homeless guy asked me for 50 cents for a sandwich. I said, "First let me see the sandwich."
Maybe if I tilt my head to the side I can understand English – dogs
Personally, I think failure should be an option
How long do I have to lay on the couch in the same position before I can call it "yoga"?