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It is hard to imagine how people showed their anger before doors were invented.
You know what`s more miraculous than a video with a million view but no dislikes on YouTube? The detention sheet empty for my class.
Women have all the answers, to all of your questions, and you don`t even have to ask.
this guy with binoculars has been watching me watch him with binoculars and i don`t know who`s winning
(Apocalyptic world) "Well guys......there goes our last female"
I am better off now than I was 4 beers ago...
Someone invited me to their dog`s birthday party on Saturday. What a freak! I am NOT coming to your dog`s birthday party! Besides, my cat is getting married that weekend!
Hey ladies, tired of your man complaining about how long it takes you to get ready? Start blow drying your hair in the nude. I promise no more complaints.
Ask.com is useless............they have no idea where I put my car keys either
People without kids: I`ll never yell at my kids ... People with kids: I DONT KNOW WHY SOMEONE SPIT THEIR GUM ON THE ROAD, JUST WALK!
The early bird needs a punch in the throat.
I`d like to help you out ... Which way did you come in?
The other night, I posted on Facebook I was going to sleep shirtless. The next day I logged on and saw 7 mosquitoes "like" this.
A book fell on my head, I can only blame my shelf.
~WARNING~ I will more than likely offend you at some point in time