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A friend doesn`t question your motive, they just keep their mouth shut and dig.
Facebook game requests are like the Jehovah`s witnesses of the internet.
The difference between “like” “love” and “in love” is the same as the difference between “for now” “for a while” and “forever”
someone took my mood ring away... dont know how i feel about it
At the young age of 5, a bear told me that I am the only person who can prevent forest fires. Why I was chosen, I`ll never know.
The computers were down at work today, so we had to do everything manually. It took me twenty minutes to shuffle the cards to play solitaire.
Goodnight, good people - and nite nite to the naughty ones too!
bitches want what they cant have..or thats what I keep telling myself
You know you have anger-management issues when you use an entire can of fly spray at point blank range to kill the tinest of moths...
You say illegal, I say added to my bucket list.
I was asked what I would give the woman who has everything? Well...my phone number for a start
If it`s any consolation, your Doppelganger is probably having a really awesome day.
First Ebola case in USA , and the Walking Dead starts next week... brb gonna go buy a crossbow.
Why don`t they make Neapolitan ice cream but with 3 better flavors?
What do 95% of men do after an orgasm? Delete their browser history.