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I hide from people too, so I get it unicorns, I get it.
I swear, watching people at a 4-way stop sign is like watching `Night at the Roxbury.` "Him? Me? Oh Me? Me or Him?"
Is it wrong, to put people on your bucket list?
DO NOT LIKE THIS… Unless you’re a sexy beast.
"Okay" means you`re in the clear. "K" means you`re better off not coming home. Fellas, you know what I`m talking about.
Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
If anyone has ever told you that you snore, just know that person has very carefully weighed the pros and cons of letting you live.
I like that CNN is tweeting a picture of ebola bacteria. It will be handy in case I encounter it in the wild. With my microscope vision.
Forget resolutions, Imma just say from now on... TGIS "Thank God I Survived" ! :)
I`m not saying we should kill all the incompetent people. I`m simply suggesting we remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.
If I could bring one dead person back to life I`d bring back Walk Disney. Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction..
They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what! Who wants to be in a hurry?!?
When I get a prescription for drugs, I don`t ask, `Will it work? Are there any side effects?` No, it`s `Can I drink with these?`
Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Hell Yes.
Half of my life has been spent hoping people don’t see me.