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Smile at the people who hate you. It makes them wonder what you`re up to. :)
I`m pretty sure my Internet Explorer “error reports” end up the same place my letters to Santa do.
I’m a proud supporter of messy hair and sweatpants.
I am addicted to Cold Turkey. Not sure how I will ever quit that one.
I’d be much more interested in meeting people if I didn’t think most people were idiots.
Coworker drank the last of the coffee and now he`s going to the clinic for a `work related` injury.
I refuse to jump on the `I hate Mondays` bandwagon. I hate all workdays equally
anyone celebrating anything today? Anything at all... doesn`t matter what. I just need something to drink to.
I hope this snowstorm doesn`t impact my schedule of aimlessly wasting my day online.....
Well, Thanks to SAMSUNG, flat screens are no longer `Flat`.
The moment when someone says a word and everyone laughs, including you and then someone goes, "Do you know what that means?" and you go "No, not really."
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
I’m not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing.
Sorry I got really drunk and ended up being really mouthy and offensive at your party next week.
There are weight limits on car seats, airlines, skydiving, military, horseback riding, kayaks, and bikes……how is it there are no weight limit on high heels?