Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
When in doubt, just do the opposite of whatever the person wearing pajamas in public is doing.
I don`t just sing in my shower, I perform.
On a scale of Doopers, you`re pretty Super.
I think pet shops should give a free laser pointer with every Cat purchase.
Automatic doors make me feel like a Jedi
It`s funny to watch all these people Bumping Up their own posts.
My fitness goal is just to get down to the weight that I lied about on my drivers license.
I bet my mom is looking down on me right now, wherever she is. She`s not dead, just very condescending.
If tomatoes are a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie.
I saw my ex girlfriend broken down with two flat tires this morning which made me late for work... Nine times I drove past before she noticed me laughing at her.
You ever think that maybe the reason geese are always honking is because they`re flying too close together?
I give up on life! I have better luck playing Monopoly...or Clue...
Now that cell phones are becoming more and more waterproof, pretty soon it will be okay to push people into pools again...
When you are not happy and would like to go back to being young, think of Algebra!
I`m so poor I went to the ducks today to beg for bread...