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I have no words to describe this day. I do however have a number of obscene gestures that would work.
I really should learn to say "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"
I figured out the chemical composition of Holy Water. It`s H2OMG
I put a dollar in one of those change machines once. Nothing changed.
How to fall down stairs: Step 1 Step 6 Step 7,8,9,11
Couples Halloween costumes always end up looking like one person went along with it to save the relationship.
About to stick a pin in your voodoo doll.... Brace yourself.
She was rare, like an onion ring in french fries
I walked briskly with scissors today. Iām pretty wild.
if it has tits or tires sooner or later it will give you problems.
We should bury everyone upside down so if they come back as zombies they`ll dig the wrong way. It`s called thinking ahead guys.
New diet plan: murder all the skinny people.
U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. how many fish do you have?? stop counting smart one fish can`t drown
You know, rumor has it that the Mona Lisa may have been the first selfie.
From what I can piece together, this Pitbull character enjoys "partying"