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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

"Ramen." - Scooby Doo finishing a prayer.
To all my Facebook friends. Have a happy St. Patrick`s day, and all the festivities this weekend. Stay safe, enjoy life, and if you by chance happen to find a bartender who is bad at math...give me a call :)
Seeing a spider isn`t a problem. It becomes a problem when the spider disappears.
We all have that one friend who always gives the best relationship advice , but is still single.
I`m going to go take a hot shower, it`s like a normal shower but with me in it
I’m thinking of leaving my body to science. Even scientists need a good laugh now and then.
I am who I am, your approval is not needed.
My new year`s resolution is that donuts have no calories.
If cartoons can wear the same clothes everyday then so can I, dammit!
I’ve finally decided to do something about my weight ... Lie.
I`ve got big plans for the weekend. If things go well, come Monday morning I`m gonna need a chiropractor, a psychiatrist, a priest and bail money.
Over half the contacts in my phone are named β€œDo Not Answer”
Yesterday I fell off a 50 foot ladder. It`s probably a good thing I was on the bottom step...
They say you are what you eat but I don’t remember eating a sexy beast.
If you slept with my husband I`d be like "OMG how much do I owe you?"