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My tacos arrived with a fork on the plate. I can only guess it`s there to stab potential taco thieves.
See, this is why I never like too wake up, it means doing things.
I watch so many crime shows on Tv, that when I turn off the Tv set, I wipe my fingerprints 0ff the remote.
When my kids grow up, I`m going to their house to break their stuff, eat all their food, make a huge mess, say I`m bored & then just leave!
Before Google, I averaged 220 Snapple bottles before I found the answer.
I will kill you with kindness even if I have to beat the shit out of you.
Can you imagine the reaction 20 years ago if you showed people a photo album filled with pictures you took of yourself in the bathroom?
If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.
Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn`t already know that.
The five stages of Sunday: depression, anger, bargaining, acceptance, Netflix
Sorry, just got your text. Are we still on for last night?
If anyone tells you, you have ADHD. Pay no attention.
Remember to always be yourself. Unless you suck.
Anyone knows when is Facebook sending us the W-2 forms
So today my gym was crowded...at least I think it was a gym...Do gyms usually have drive thrus?