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I just love having sex with you...Next time I hope you are there with me.
You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks what you like to do for fun.
There’s nothing better than a nap after a good nights sleep.
Dog Found: Now we are bros, so he`s staying. Don`t call, don`t make it weird.
You’ll never be as young as you are now.
It`s gonna be hotter than Billy Ray Cyrus after watching his daughters performance on the VMA`s tomorrow!
The worst part about being single is always doing what I want. Anytime. Anywhere. With whomever. That sucks.
If spiders ever come to the realization that people are terrified of them, we`re f*cked.
I could defuse a bomb if it sounded like an alarm clock and I was sleeping.
Any convenience store that requires the customer to wear pants isn’t convenient at all.
First thing I do when I realize I’m lost…turn the radio down.
I wish I had money so I could be eccentric instead of just weird.
Maybe don`t show me a picture if you don`t want me to rate your baby.
Going to make pizza for dinner!! Ingredients Required: Phone, Menu & Credit Card.. Ohhh I can smell it cooking already!! ;)
What if Justin Bieber is also Miley Cyrus? I mean have you ever seen them in one place at the same time?