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This is a private status. Please don`t tell anyone about it.
Dont let facebook fool you we aint friends
I have a bad habit of laughing at inappropriate moments.
High fiving was the original "like".
I`m still trying to get over the fact that oranges are pre-sliced by nature.
I`m the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body.
Always envied the kids who showed up to school with their 64 count Crayola crayons. If I wanted Burgundy or Salmon I had to ask in shame.
I don`t even think it`s possible for a bear to cook porridge.
I`m off to bed. For those of you who wish to add a touch of authenticity to your fantasies, the sheets are pale blue...
Shouldn’t the Air and Space museum be empty?
Nice try, Henry Winkler, but I’m not inclined to take mortgage advice from a guy who lived above the Cunningham’s garage for like ten years.
All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening
I`m surrounded by sex addicts & alcoholics. So glad I found y`all.
Being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible
I should probably do some housework before they try to film the next Febreeze commercial here.