Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
They say love is more important than money. I`d like to see them go and try to pay their bills with a hug.
PRINCIPAL: are you the new english teacher? TEACHER: yes i are.
I`m proud of anyone who has quit doing drugs and alcohol, I don`t want to hang out with you now but I`m still proud...
Miracle Whip is a bit of an exaggeration if you ask me.
If weed is ever legalized, I can`t wait to see the commercials...
I am not cut out for the CIA. All the opposing side would have to do is tickle me and I’d spill all our nation’s secrets.
Apparently putting Alka-Seltzer in my mouth while getting baptized and pretending I’m being possessed by the devil is not funny.
Soup of the day: Beer
Why is it the less money someone makes the better they are at reproducing?
After the doctor left the exam room from my prostate exam. The nurse came in with three words I didn`t want to hear. "Who was that?"
Writing is a great career when people like hearing what you have to say but don`t want to look at you.
Do you think we like to sing in the shower because we all love a good soap opera?
I always put in a full eight hours at work. Spread out over the course of the week.
Why do people at home on TV have their pants on?
Hoping to get "till death do us part" reduced to a 15 year sentence and time served.