Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You all take typos way too serious, you gays.
Bored? Update your Facebook to “in a relationship” with someone you’ve never met just to see if they’ll confirm.
It should be standard for wedding invitations to state if there will be an open bar or not.
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it. I`m totally flexible.
Holding my breath until someone likes this status.
I’ve been waiting 2 hours for an employee to come and wash my hands like the sign says….
Unless you fell off the treadmill and smashed your face, nobody wants to hear about your workout.
Michael Schumacher`s former crew just visited him in the hospital. They changed the wheels on his bed and his drip in 4.4 secs.
Not sure if I need sex, sleep, or to punch someone in the face.
My neighbour has diabetes and now she won`t make me cupcakes anymore, its like bad things always happen to me.
Accept the craziness. Life will be a bore without it.
Do you ever wish that you could just unmeet someone.
My date is in 2 hours, which means I have very little time to fix my glasses and fix my bangs and get a career and lose 50 pounds
I don`t need WebMD to tell me what`s wrong with me, I have my mother.
People often mistake me for being a good listener. The truth is, I really just don`t want to talk.