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I am trying my very best to get into the holiday spirit but I cant open the damn bottle.
Do you ever wish you had a second chance to meet someone again for the first time?
Feeding my kid cold pizza. They will be off to college soon and preparation is the key to success.
I read my kids a few select facebook statuses before bed, kiss them on their heads, and whisper, "This is why we have to stay in school"
exercise........you mean extra fries
Autocorrect is changing correctly spelled words. I’m starting to think it has a mind of its AUTOCORRECT IS HARMLESS. GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.
The best thing about smartphones is that you don`t have to refold maps anymore.
I live like I type, fast and with lots of mistakes!
3 Things you need to know: Yes I Have. Yes I Can. Yes I will.
I wouldn`t say I "missed" your call.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
The closest I ever got to murdering is when I held a Oreo cookie in milk until the bubbles stop.
I’m always disappointed when a liar’s pants don’t actually catch on fire.
No need to blind fold me, just hand me my phone and drive, I won`t have a clue how to get back here
I look forward to paying off all my debt so I can get back to just being broke