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I`ve decided to go my own way and think "inside the box" to be different ... Wow its dark in here!
It`s weird how we are all here because of boners
I get you, anti-evolution people. I`m too lazy to learn science too.
Eventually we’re just gonna have to accept “ducking” is a swear word.
Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.
That very akward moment when Shakirah`s hips lie!
You have to hand it to Subway for convincing us it`s acceptable to eat an entire loaf of bread for lunch.
If its true we`re here to help others, then what exaclty are the others here for?
I was gonna call you... but I`m still sober.
Scared some Jehovah`s Witnesses today by going to the door completely naked. I`m not sure what scared them more, me being totally naked or the fact that I knew where they lived.
My grandpa has Alzheimer`s, so I just keep telling him he owes me twenty bucks.
Why is it so hard to find an exercise bike with a nice little basket where I can put my nachos?
I’m not a “stalker”. I want to make sure you’re okay at all times. You can look at me as an unpaid bodyguard.
What am I doing with the rest of my life? I don`t even know what I`m doing with the rest of this post...
I’m watching this show on stalkers, still haven’t seen any of you yet.