Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Eventually I will find Bigfoot and he will tell me all he knows about Hide & Seek.
I had s*x with my friend`s wife last night and now I feel awful. She must have had the flu or something.
Porn is so unrealistic. There`s no way a guy with a ponytail could have a house that nice.
Great idea for an April Fools Prank ... Hide all of the desktop icons on someone`s computer and replace their wallpaper with a screenshot of their old desktop.
If by crunches you mean Captain Crunch cereal, then yes I do crunches.
I wonder if one day somebody will knock on my door and say to me, “Hey ,we have 7 mutual friends in Facebook; may I come in?"
How long does it usually take for a Happy Meal to start working?.... It`s been an hour.
When ever I have a panic attack, I put a brown paper bag over my mouth and drink all the rum inside. It seems to help.
It`s been close to a million years since I exaggerated about anything.
“Don’t make me regret this.” -things I think when accepting a friend request.
U still drunk from last night or did u get a new buzz going this morning.
We get it poets: things are like other things
Just once, I`d like to clock out from work by sliding down a dinosaur.
Sorry I made fun of your erectile dysfunction, I hope there’s no hard feelings.
My local news station says it gives us " news when it breaks " ...I want unbroken news!!