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It`s kind of funny how so many people think that being gay is a choice but being fat isn`t
I’m having some vision trouble today. I can’t see myself doing anything.
Ok advertisers, for the last time. I’m playing a game I downloaded for free. So, the fact that you chose to advertise here means your product is grossly overpriced…
The worst thing about that guy who posts non-stop gym updates is that all that exercise is gonna make him live longer.
Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your house. Those bastads live forever.
I am tired of men complaining about women complaining about men complaining about women
Happy 4th of July ... U can toss out the Christmas tree now
Empty your medicine cabinet and put another mirror in there. Scares the hell out of snooping house guests.
I`m glad I`m me, I don`t think anybody else could take it.
OMG! I just discovered that if I align them JUST right, that I can make your boobs stand straight up (just like the broom trick)! Message me for an appointment! ;)
If you`re in a hole, stop digging...
My phone tried to autocorrect "f*cking" to "f*ck king," and I was like hell yeah I am.
My wife complains about everything I do. It`s like she doesn`t know there are "Sexy singles in my area" that want to meet with me.
I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people throughout the world. I told them to F off!! Anybody who fits into my clothes isn`t starving!!
Every store should have one line for people who have their sh!t together.