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How come the energizer bunny beats a drum instead of doing something like working the cashier register at Wal-Mart?
Laxatives............for people who don`t give a crap.
Ok advertisers, for the last time. I’m playing a game I downloaded for free. So, the fact that you chose to advertise here means your product is grossly overpriced…
My husband ran for 30 minutes on the treadmill. He`s told every other person on earth and I didn`t want y`all to be out of the loop.
Everytime I see a mattress tied to the top of a car, I think….there’s another prostitute making a house call……
How about a ceiling fan with brakes so I don`t have to stand there for 10 seconds wondering if I actually turned it off.
My son asked what he should say if a bully said to give him his lunch money. I said tell him you left it on his moms nightstand.
No thanks, cardio, this pot of coffee will get my heart rate up just fine
I bet someone could get really rich opening a business that untangles Christmas lights!
I just assume I do everything wrong since I don`t have a wife to confirm it.
I really don`t know what the big deal is about Black Friday. I black out every Friday....
Hibernation should be a human thing too.
"I understand your logic, but let`s try to look at this more emotionally." - women
I`ve always wondered is jellyfish are sad because there are no peanut butter fish.
I once met a guy who was addicted to huffing brake fluid. He said he could stop any time.