Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People of planet Earth, thank your gods that I`m not in charge of the red button.
I just researched the medicinal name for Viagra..... MYCOXAPHAYLYN
Only 3 things can make me run. When someone yells, "Fire", "Free beer" or "The free beer is on fire”
Now what`s funny is "Si" from Duck Dynasty
My life is a lot like Ikea furniture with missing instructions. I’ll get it together eventually but it won’t ever feel quite right.
I remember my single days like it was 11 years, 1 month, and 12 days ago.
When I`m in an elevator with a stranger I generally hold their hand to let them know that they`re safe
Woke up to gun shots this morning. Luckily my wife has horrible aim.
Sometimes I feel like a loser for spending so much time on Facebook. Then I remember there are people out there who comment on pornhub videos
Can anyone recommend a few thousand books on hoarding?
The guy who named the "chimichanga" should be given more authority to name things.
Is the "D" in Donkey Kong a typo? It should have been Monkey Kong right? These are the things that keep me up at night.
Internet Dating......The Odds are good but the Goods are odd
Suddenly I can`t remember if it`s ok to use tampons as Nerf darts or if it`s the other way around.
Good thing I got a college degree I think as I put away the kid toys for the 49 billionth time