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When people ask me what I did over the weekend, I always squint and respond “Why, what did you hear?”
We had a power outage last week and my PC, TV and games console shut down immediately, so I had to talk to my family for a few hours. They seem like nice people.
Dinosaurs never had pizza and they all died.
Stole a cart from this woman at Walmart today. I like to think of it as playing grand theft auto suburbs edition.
I`m doing the KFC Bucket Challenge!
When you can no long help someone, I can - said the coroner.
I think I need to lose some weight. I tried to sit up earlier and ended up rocking myself to sleep
I was raised on the streets is more manly than saying I grew up watching Sesame Street.
I don`t mean to brag, but my posts are enjoyed by well over 20 people worldwide...
The number of things that are *NOT* rocket science is staggering.
There should be an "oh my god, shut up already" button.
For the life of me, I can’t understand why small and medium pizzas exist.
I hate people who take drugs ... Customs for example.
Do girls that make duck faces in pictures walk in a V formation at the mall?
New documentary movie about white trash .... I only saw the trailer ....