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If you`re bored, wear a cape. Then you can be Super Bored
Someday, I hope to be so rich that I`ll never be happy again.
Am I the only one who calculates how much sleep I can get before I go to bed?
"Please don`t put a million dumb photos of me on your Facebook... it just annoys your friends" - Every baby
I`m more confused than a homeless person on house arrest.
I read an article the other day that said, "if you drink every day you are an alcoholic." Thank god I only drink every night
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
I put my head between my legs and lean forward.....thats how I roll
I bet short people get really excited when they accidentally hit their head on things.
Thanks for posting another selfie. I completely forgot what you looked like 24 hours ago.
To hell with the "dislike" button! i think we need a "who cares" button, a "WTF" button and a "STFU!" button. just saying.... Oh and a "lol" button because i just get tired of writing it! lol!
Cookies and porn are always better when they`re homemade!
There`s a Bullying Support Group meeting, tomorrow night at 8 ... You`d better f*cking be there.
Defies physics: I eat half a pound of food, `purge` 1 pound of it, and then gain five pounds because of it-- WTF?
The best part about growing old with you is that I`ll always be the younger one.