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WhoΒ΄s up for Candyland? $20 buy in
Legally,ItΒ΄s questionable. Morally,ItΒ΄s disgusting. Personally,I like it.
I`m starting to think mosquitoes just land on our faces not to suck blood but to see how stupid we look when we slap ourselves.
I`m not fat, God gave me built in airbags because I`m so precious.
Timeouts just give children a quiet place to plot your murder.
Sometimes I think I`m a relatively smart person. Other times I put my shoes on before my pants and realize who I really am.
It`s just a matter of time before they add the word "Syndrome" after my last name...
I had no plans on looking sexy today, but sh!t happens.
I imagine a world where whining on Facebook is illegal.
I canβt even imagine the self control required to work at a bubble wrap factory.
Advertising taught me that hair conditioner makes you move in slow motion.
It would be funny if the husband is actually sleeping with the Jake from state Farm.
"Huh?" (my thought for the day)
I wonder how the Never-ending story is doing.
My posts come from a dark place.. I haven`t paid my light bill in 3 months.