Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Million dollar idea: Pills that you can take with alcohol.
Men use love to get sex...women use sex to get love...I use coupons to get pizza!
I love how when your watching a crime show and they have to tell you that "this is a reenactment" oh really? you mean you didn`t actually catch the murder on video?
I really have important work to get done, but I really just want to sit here and complete a quiz on what percentage redneck I am..
It`s funny to watch all these people Bumping Up their own posts.
I`m so pissed right now! I`m about to open a can of... Wait…WTF??!! Since when did they start putting child-proof lids on the cans of whoop-ass? A little help please...
The "I got your nose" game is fun to play with kids, but try it on the pharmacist at Target & she`ll call security.
At 4-way stop, the first person to finish their text has the right of way right?
If a picture is worth a thousand words then why does everyone only buy Playboy magazines for the articles?
This woman just stared at the beer in my cup holder, like she`s never seen a cup holder on a grocery cart before.
My therapist goes to her therapist five minutes after I leave.
People who learned a bunch of stuff must have felt pretty stupid when Wikipedia came out.
I`ve often wondered: Who the heck is Pete, and why do we do things for his sake?
I`m gonna just take a quick nap before I go to bed.
Oh... the look on the Home Depot associate`s face when I asked him if the pruning shears will cut through bone... priceless.