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Sure, I can speak Spanish... "Margarita!"
I think when a restaurant has "lobster celebration" it is very misleading to the lobster.
If I learned anything from my children, it`s that it is always OK to do something stupid, as long as someone DARED you to do it.
Afterism (n) - A concise, clever statement you don`t think of until too late
Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface.
For the love of God, single people, stop looking for love or you`ll end up married.
I`m pretty sure if you watched a movie of my life backwards it probably would be about a guy who refills beer cans and puts them in the fridge.
“Screw it” – My final thought before making most decisions.
Sometimes I wish I was a nicer person but then I laugh and continue my day.
I`m going to stop off at the fabric store before my next status to get some new material!
If anxiety was good for weight loss, I`d be back to my birth weight.
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...
Do a little dance... Drink a lot of rum... Fall down tonight...
I don’t drink to forget about problems. I drink to create new problems that that make the old issues irrelevant.
Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong.