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Do people who run know that we’re not food anymore.
Nothing in the world is more expensive than a women who’s free for the weekend.
Don`t ``Wine and dine`` me ... ``Champagne`` me ... step it up a notch
I’ve never had angry sex. I’m always happy and quite surprised that it is actually happening.
I am starting to think I will never be old enough to know better.
wants to come back as a bird after I die.... just so i can sh!t on the people who piss me off.
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
All I`m saying is that if you were a real psychic palm reader you would of made me wash my hands first.
If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize. I honestly didn’t think you could read.
Having to cash in my State Quarter Collection`s map for gas money is reaching a new low.
The real trouble with reality is that there`s no background music.
I’m not single and I’m not committed… I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves…
Four out of five voices in my head are saying this is gonna` be a great day.
Mosquito`s and parking inspectors must be from the same family...
I feel like we really lowered our expectations of what constitutes magic when we began using it to describe markers