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Taco Bell is donating burritos to feed firefighters in Colorado. Talk about putting gas on the fire,
Talked to someone in person today....what a pain in the a$$ that was!
"This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall." - Every 2 year old with a Popsicle.
I know you think you´re interesting because you have an accent. But a drunken slur is not an accent.
Things that schools worry about Drugs 1% Graduating 1% drop outs 1% the inportance of using a number 2 pencil on standardized tests 97%
If you need some help at Home Depot and are being ignored, get on one of their step ladders
My workout plan really only consists of me wandering around in parking lots because I forgot where I parked...
Somebody tell me how "Rub a dub dub, 3 men in a tub" became a nursery rhyme?
How many divorced guys does it take to change a lightbulb?...........Who cares, they NEVER get the house anyways
Single ? I`m not single, I`m in a long standin relationship with fun and freedom ! ;)
I once bought shoes in China that said "made around the corner"
1) Go to Starbucks 2) Order coffee 3) Tell them your name is Waldo 4) Leave
I think I speak for everyone here when I say "I haven`t the slightest idea as to where my life is headed"
I just googled Magnum condoms and I swear I could hear Siri laughing.
If you cut your child`s sandwich into squares instead of triangles, you suck at parenting...