Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
She might be ugly now, but wait a few more drinks.
The first step to admitting you have a problem is having a problem.
Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.
Maybe vodka is addicted to me
It`s been few days since I heard from the voices in my head, I think it`s the calm before the storm. Some big sh!t is gonna go down!!
Ladies, if you are really good at blow jobs, you don’t have to pretend to like football.
I hate it when I put a status and you don`t like it,example this one.
Sometimes I whisper, "I`m on your side" to the computers, just in case they ever succeed in taking over the world...
This idiot from Apple reckons that the "Temperature, iPhone needs to cool down" warning message has nothing to do with all my hot selfies
When a man says he`ll do anything for a woman, he means slaying dragons, killing zombies and rescuing her from castle towers. IT DOES NOT MEAN cleaning garage, fixing roof and cleaning out the basement!
Every time I visit my parents, I send the kids in first so they can signal me if it`s an intervention.
Google must be a woman...it knows everything.
Ever since I installed AdBlock, all the single ladies in my area seemed to have lost interest.
I bet if you look up dictionary in the dictionary it says "don`t be an a$$hole"
I party like a rockstar. A very poor rockstar who isn`t in a band.