Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
No I don`t think you`re stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking
people live & people die, but in the the end we still get high.. so if in life you dont succeed, F*CK it All & smoke some WEED ?
Accidentally used AOL.com, I betting the employees there are celebrating and think they have a sure future.
If aliens ever attack, I hope they do it in rows of 8, going right and left directly above me. I`m very skilled at shooting aliens this way
thinks that decaffeinated coffee is just useless brown water.
I`ve seen more pins in the last few days then stone cold steve austin on groundhog day..
I`m painting a blue square in my garden, so that Google Earth thinks I have a pool.
Don’t be upset that you’re single; be happy that someone isn’t ruining your life.
I opened a bottle of wine to let it breathe. It didn`t. So I gave it mouth to mouth.
I just met the most interesting man at the laundromat And then I realized that he can`t even afford a washer or a dryer
Cop cars should play the jaws theme song
never tell a lie...unless it is true
I`m absolutely nailing this "I give a sh!t" face today!
I have my hesitations about Paradise City if the first thing you brag about is the color of the grass
A murderer was about to be put to death in the electric chair. "Do you have any last requests?" asked the chaplain. "One," he replied. "Will you hold my hand?"