Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Make somebody happy today... mind your own business!!!
Ah Friday my second favorite F Word
My nephew asked me what marriage was like. So I gave him a candy bar and told him not to eat it.
You know what’s funnier than watching someone trip and fall? Absolutely nothing!
Is "blowjob" one word or two words? God I hate writing thank you cards. -Bfanch
I’m pretty much always down for a snack.
FB friends, please let me know if you own one of those cool little Smart cars so I can unfriend you.
There’s really no reason to repeat yourself. I ignored you just fine the first time.
OMG, you`re huge! There`s no way you`ll fit inside me.- My clothes probably.
How do I like my eggs? ... Ummm, in a cake
After all these years, I`m beginning to suspect that Waldo doesn`t want to be found.
Wow, that Macy`s parade is crazy! The Kanye West float just cut off Snoopy and said Woodstock can fly better!
My 5 year plan includes purchasing a Slurpee machine.
My ex-girlfriend broke up with me because she says I was obsessed with football. I was shocked. I mean we were together for 3 1/2 seasons.
Friends are like boobs. Some are real, some are fake