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It’s called “Karma” and it’s pronounced [hah hah fuhk yoo]!!
I handle stress the way cats bathe in water.
Hi can you fill this prescription please? Sir this is just a post-it note with `give me the good stuff` written on it.
Just because they sell yoga pants in XXL doesn`t mean it`s ok to wear them in public.
Why isn`t Hungary`s capital city called "Very"
“Shh.. Do you hear that?” “What? I heard nothing.” “Exactly, it’s the sound of no one caring.”
Don´t wait for the perfect moment. Take the moment and make it perfect.
When you were little, “I’m going to tell your mom” was the scariest sentence ever.
You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.
Why do they have “limited edition” scented candles? Are there crazy people collecting these things?
I always like seeing those "Baby on Board" stickers because it`s nice to see agreeable babies out there.
The key to a long relationship: Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty.
Those beards make the Red Sox look like they`re going to a Civil War reenactment as Confederates.
I believe in living every day like it`s my last day, and on my last day, I plan to take it easy.
Fitness? More like, fitness whole pizza in my mouth.