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If gas prices keep going up I`m cutting off the bottom of my car and I`m "Flintstoning" That mf!
Ok advertisers, for the last time. I’m playing a game I downloaded for free. So, the fact that you chose to advertise here means your product is grossly overpriced…
Facebook is basically just you having a conversation with yourself hoping that someone else will join in.
If Eve sacraficed the whole human race for Apple, I wonder what she would have done for a Klondike Bar?
I think you and I both know that you`re not facebook friends with me for the funny statuses.
There are times, when I actually am hungry like the wolf. But thanks to Duran Duran I can`t tell anyone without sound like a complete f*cking idiot
Bad news, guys. Throwing a cat through a wall doesn`t make a funny, cat-shaped hole
Somewhere, right this minute, someone is reading this sentence.
I like to go to the bar and flip peoples license plates upside down, then go home and listen to my scanner.
I’ve just woken up, and it appears that Earth is temporarily safe from harm & currently doesn’t need my assistance, so I’m going back to bed.
IMPORTANT REMINDER: Sunday is Mother`s Day, which means Facebook is gonna be annoying as crap...
When I say “wow, that’s crazy”, 99 percent of the time, it means I haven’t been listening to a word of your conversation.
Lightning is like God`s way of saying "Get out of that tree you pervert!"
If Shakespeare is correct and "all the world is a stage" then I seriously would like to be in control of that trap door.
If something`s worth doing, it`s worth doing rihgt.