Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Teamwork is just another way of saying we will soon be sharing in the blame equally.
I am so confused. My boss just said "keep up the good work" and I have no recollection of doing any such work.
You can test my patience all you want, but Iβm never going to pass.
I get so confused when I`m about to watch a TV show or movie and "For Mature Audiences Only" appears on the screen. Can I watch or not?
It`s weird how in England the passenger drives the car
Remeber that time we came to work and we were excited? Me neither.
It isnβt premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married, right?
I`ve been eating a lot of extra calories since daylight savings to make up for that hour of eating I missed.
Life is fun! You should get one.
I`ve just seen an advert in my local newspaper. ACCOUNTANT NEEDED! $35,000 - $40,000 So I called them up and said, "The answer is -$5,000."
Everytime I see a person jogging I already know they have facebook, everyone on facebook works out.
I`ve been married twice. The next wife I have will be someone else`s and she can just go home when she`s mad at me.
If Iβm going to sweep all of my problems under the rug, then Iβm going to need a bigger rug.
I got food poisoning today. I don`t know when I`ll use it though.
is ready to have one too many!