Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
To stupidity ... And beyond!!
I have no idea what a bejeezus is,,, but apparently mine scares easy.
Mom: If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you do it too? Me: If all parents used that same metaphor would you use it too?
Happy National hear fireworks all day and night set off by Drunk People you wouldn`t trust with a Glo-Stick Day.
Why is it called tourist season if we can`t shoot them?
If the world dosen`t end on the 21st, I sure do have a lot of MREs to gift wrap.
Each day is a gift, but some days are socks and underwear
I can make your gf scream louder than you can. - Spider
I`m only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand
am I the only one who would beat the sh!t out of someone for wearing a "forever lazy" to a tailgate?
Just ran across a great dessert recipe...Cut up some bananas, apples & oranges in a bowl. Add fresh squeezed lime juice. Then toss it in the trash and eat a cheesecake.
I noticed you’re not yourself today. I really like it.
Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it’s a beautiful day.
I`m pretty sober, but I`m prettier drunk.