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I propose we change the names of the upper case P and lower case p to "P standing up" and "p sitting down."
word of the day: nincomtard
Silence is Golden, except when coming from children… Then you’d better go check to see what’s broken.
I suffer from paranoid-schizophrenic indifference. I really don`t care what the voices in my head are saying behind my back.
The final stage of adulthood is when you start saying, "Oooh, that breeze feels nice."
I hate it when I walk through a metal detector, and my abs of steel set it off.
Edward Scissorhands will never win a game of rock, paper, scissors.
NEWS FLASH: Man arrested for having sex with a tree.....Police confirm he had wood!!!
Shout out to the new couples still holding in farts.
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old...
None of my friends laugh at any of my jokes because cats can only meow.
Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible.
According to national reports, car thefts in the US are now at a 20 year low…Well, sure, it’s hard to steal a car when the owner’s living in it…
If Santa doesn`t bring me something good I`m going to pee in his lap like I did when I was eight.
A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in.