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I bet sex is great when I`m not the only one in the room.
"Lazy" is a strong word. I prefer to call it selective participation.
Ninja Mode is not a plausible excuse for not being seen at work.
My Boss requested me on facebook. I was like "pssst". If only he knew all the sh*t I post about his ugly @$$.
Soup of the day: Tequila.
A fun thing to do when leaving the Zoo, is too start frantically running and yelling "OMG they`ve all escaped!"
My cat is wearing a cone & has learned to scoop up his food and let it slide into his mouth and it`s giving me serious ideas, folks
Hey babe, go to Google Earth, zoom in on your house. See that blue cap in the bushes? Hi!
Idea: maybe the police force for a town of 20,000 shouldn`t have access to weapons you ordinarily need cheat codes to get
Slowly, Waldo`s wife and Mr. Sandiego started putting the pieces together
Don`t be afraid of a few extra pounds, fat people are much harder to kidnap.
Getting a text from someone when I`m trying to Facebook is the emotional equivalent to walking into a spider web.
:): The Bipolar smiley face
Like a good neighbor,I don`t really care.
I`d say go to hell, but I don`t want to see you again.