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I am so thankful there is no alert that tells someone how many times I have enlarged their profile pics.
I don`t care about your status...
Some people just need sympathetic pat.........on the head........with a hammer
I`m one more bottle of wine away from starting a blog.
I am a very tolerant person until you think differently than me. Then I act like a spoiled little brat.
Watching a movie with the girlfriend tonight. Can anyone recommend a good girlfriend?
I’m not shy, I’m just really good out figuring out who is not worth talking to.
That awkward moment when a comment gets more “likes” than your status.
Dwjxdjdhjfrjfjhrha! Sorry--you will get a more coherent status update AFTER I`ve had my coffee!
my boss told me to start the presentation with a joke,so I showed my payslip.
There`s a warning light on my dashboard of a vague exclamation point. It`s like when my girlfriend was mad at me and she wouldn`t say why.
I`ve started an exercise program. I do 20 sit-ups each morning. That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that snooze button so many times.
Don`t understand how people in depression commercials can be sad with how attractive they are.
People who sit and talk while their pizza is gets cold gives me anxiety.
If you’ve been naughty… go to your room. If you want to be naughty… go to mine.