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I really would love to see two mimes arguing.
Do you guys dance in the shower too? This morning I did the robot! (I short circuited and stared at the wall for 40 minutes, broken)
It’s like these fools at the gym have never seen someone with roller skates on the treadmill before.
The older I get the more I understand Squidward`s anger.
It`s called PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
I just drink until the sadness becomes hilarious.
I don`t know, guys. The whole "play dead when a bear attacks" thing sounds suspiciously like something the bears would come up with...
My wife just said that I was the worst behaved out of all her children.
When my wife picks a restaraunt that I don’t like, I just say “oh yeah, that’s where that really cute girl works”. Problem solved.
I`m changing my facebook username to NOBODY so that way when people post crappy posts, and i press the like button it will say NOBODY likes this
Single ? I`m not single, I`m in a long standin relationship with fun and freedom ! ;)
It’s what’s on the inside that counts, unless you’re talking about one of those hollow chocolate bunnies.
I am who I am, your approval is not needed.
I just don`t understand why Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell car insurance.
The hardest part of parenting is standing idly by while your children build a mediocre couch fort.