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Exercise? More like extra fries.
Remember way back when the only thing that was annoying on your feed were game requests?
I don`t always have awkward moments, but when I do I make sure I write them on Facebook so my friends know how awkward they were.
what if the princess wants to be with bowser, but mario keeps kidnapping her
Yes, I realize I’m leaving early. But don’t forget, I also came in late.
The fridge is a clear example that what matters is what`s inside.
It`s the little things in life that matter the most... for instance the refrigerator light, helping you to see that last beer way in the back!
It must be really hard to judge wet t-shirt contests. I saw one recently, and all the t-shirts looked equally wet.
thinks we need to think like a first grade teacher and separate Romney and Gingrich next time they debate!
Look in the mirror and tell me that God does not have a sense of humor.
Not now, I`m busy bringing shame to my family on the internet.
I hate when homesless people shake their cup of coins at me. It`s like yeah I know you have more money than me, no need to rub it in.
I`m great at making pancakes and women uncomfortable.
Don’t let anybody push you around ... unless you’re in a wagon, cuz that is just plain fun.
Cute things to put in a letter to your boyfriend/girlfriend; I adore you. You complete me. Must stay 500 yards away at all times.