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I support recycling, I wore this shirt yesterday.
is tring to fool people into thinking I have a social life by going offline from Facebook for a few hours.
Men hang out in bars for one of two reasons: Either they have no wife to go home to, or they do
Thought cartoons were getting better. Turns out it was a news story about Justin Bieber.
I decided I`m not doing the whole clock-back routine this year. If you need me, I`ll be in the frickin future.
We will always have that special 5 minutes before I started creeping you out.
I yawn all day at work & school. But when it comes to at night, Iām not tired at all.
Trust me when I say anyone can dance! - Jack Daniels
Iām considering becoming a mind reader ... What are your thoughts?
My "Do Not Disturb" facial expression is not working today.
Iām bored enough to clean.
I hate when men`s restrooms have no urinals and a bunch of women in them.
The guy who used to proofread Hitler`s speeches was the first grammar Nazi.
My mom told me to follow my dreams. So I took a nap.
The general rule is that you shouldn`t ride an elevator during a fire, but I mean, talk about a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity