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The whole purpose of vacationing is to make you appreciate knowing where the channels are at home.
Facebook has suggested that I POKE you.
If I had a dollar for every time someone told me I`m cute, I would have 1 dollar ... thanks mom.
ROFL!!….. LOL jk i’m still in my chair.
was on the treadmill for over an hour and I must say it is much easier with roller blades
Peanut butter sandwiches taste better when cut in half diagonally...........Listen,, I don`t make the rules people.
The only thing actually impossible in life is taking a picture for a group of women and having ALL of them like it.
Life is like a p@nis. Simple, soft, straight, relaxed and hanging freely. Then women make it hard
If you`re going to walk a mile in my shoes, could you pick me up some booze on your way back?
There is nothing more terrifying than sneezing while driving.
If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got "YOLO" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly
If your bf/gf tries to start a fight with you just say, "Please. Not during Toyotathon."
You never truly appreciate Newton’s laws of motion until you’ve sneezed while going to the bathroom.
When I say I can cook, I mean I can melt cheese on stuff.
I’m pretty sure I have atleast one anscestor who would be pretty pissed to find out that helicopters exist and I can’t fly one.