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What flavor is this Harlem Shake you speak of?
The universe contains protons,neutrons,electrons and morons.
Dont let facebook fool you we aint friends
I really hate it when people need constant re-assurance. You know what I mean?
Mistakes married men make: 1. Doing things. 2. Not doing things. 3. Thinking about doing things. 4. Not thinking about doing things.
My favorite thing about naps is that I don`t have to talk to people during them
Jellyfish have survived here on Earth for 650 million years without brains. Great news for stupid people.
I am surprised Cheech and Chong have not filmed a new movie -"Cheech and Chong Smoke Colorado"
Remember all those times I said "wow, that`s cool!"? What I really meant was, "shut the f*ck up, I hate you."
1. OMG will this ever end? 2. OMG will this ever end? 3. OMG will this ever end? - top 3 things on my mind when I`m in a conversation
If I liked one of your pics from 12 weeks ago, doesn`t mean I`m stalking you...It just means you haven`t looked nice in awhile
What I lack in sex appeal I make up in staying home and drinking.
I would never survive a real job because I dont like being told when I can eat lunch...
Over 400 billion people a year are victims of exaggerated statistics.
I don’t just act crazy, I’ll drive you there too.