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Word on the street is... Lol. Jk. I don`t go outside.
I plan on getting "sidewalk nap" drunk tonight.
My teen thought it`d be funny to post as me on Facebook. I laughed and laughed and changed the wi-fi password. Good times!
Remember kids, the Toys R Us bankruptcy and liquidation teaches us that poor spelling and grammar will always catch up with you eventually.
If Candy Crush had a face, I`d punch it.
Do women know that it`s perfectly legal to apply makeup at home before they get in their car?
I’ve never had angry sex. I’m always happy and quite surprised that it is actually happening.
One thing I think the world can agree upon… Any day when you can stay in pajamas the whole time is a good day.
Like a stoned man once said, I can`t remember.
I`m as bored as a guy with no arms looking at porn.
If you work Security in a Samsung store does that make you a Guardian of the Galaxy?
I do my best proofreading after I hit `send`.
I`m tired of things costing money
Some old people are driving vehicles right now and don’t even know it.
Please be patient...I`m fcuking things up as fast as I can.